Why does God often seem slow to answer our prayers?
Most of us wrestle silently with the tension of unanswered prayer. We grow impatient with God and wish He would just "show up". To be honest, this is often the state of my own heart. Can you relate?
Each of our situations and stories are unique, but we can cling to these truths:
1. All unanswered prayers are merely "not-yet-answered prayers". In His way and on His timetable, God does answer the prayers of those who seek Him.
2. God is doing something for our greater good and His greater glory.
Today we must trust Him and wait patiently. Humanly speaking, this is an impossible task. We can only do this by returning to Jesus each day for the nourishment of our souls and the strengthening of our hearts. For the weary, He is the only place of rest ... the only "Haven" there is.
Friday, October 28, 2011
Thursday, October 27, 2011
deafening silence
It's the deafening silence, the awareness that no one else is in the house with me...the cat follows me silently. I would not know she were here if I did not have good eye sight. The lights are off, the heat not yet turned on and I feel wrapped intransparent blanket that wont hide my feelings.
The dark rooms have nothing speical to say and boost about....they have memories, each of them. They are as quite as the air that just stands ready to be inhaled.
I have heard mum 3 times in the last 2 weeks .... she wakes me up summoning me to her side "Lois."
A weak, pleading voice, that is distinctly my loving mum needing some help...."I hurt" she use to say and I would rub hr legs gently until she said they felt better. I repositioned her, changed her, got some vicadin, gave her some water..... anything to make her feel betttr. Then tucked her in and gave her a hug and kiss. Closed the door some and proceeded back to bed when all I wanted to do was go back and curl up beside her instead of neither of us sleeping or knowing she was listening to my medication induced sleep.
I have woken with dried tears in my eyes in the morning. I have woke myself from dreams that haunt me adn the hell of nightmares. I just want a night without dreams, nightmares, talking, screaming or crying.
It's not the alone part, its the lonely part. The part without companionship, another person and their touch, voice, smell, doing something together that I so long for.
I longfor love, not just my heavenly father but a man who was into me and could not think of going anywhere without me or who needed me to rub his soreness away, make sweet passionate lustful love knowing that i lust for his flesh as he does mine.
Its just the noise of the shower, the vent, the steps, the washing machine from upstairs that Ihear like a blanket of smoothering staleness over me.
For now thisis all of me and what I know. My journal, my Bible the computer, my secret spot and holding my teddy bear as I go to sleep.....wanting so much more
I found these recently and they so fit here...............
Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out but to see who cares enough to break them down.
"We all have rooms we lock and daren't visit lest they bring pain."
The dark rooms have nothing speical to say and boost about....they have memories, each of them. They are as quite as the air that just stands ready to be inhaled.
I have heard mum 3 times in the last 2 weeks .... she wakes me up summoning me to her side "Lois."
A weak, pleading voice, that is distinctly my loving mum needing some help...."I hurt" she use to say and I would rub hr legs gently until she said they felt better. I repositioned her, changed her, got some vicadin, gave her some water..... anything to make her feel betttr. Then tucked her in and gave her a hug and kiss. Closed the door some and proceeded back to bed when all I wanted to do was go back and curl up beside her instead of neither of us sleeping or knowing she was listening to my medication induced sleep.
I have woken with dried tears in my eyes in the morning. I have woke myself from dreams that haunt me adn the hell of nightmares. I just want a night without dreams, nightmares, talking, screaming or crying.
It's not the alone part, its the lonely part. The part without companionship, another person and their touch, voice, smell, doing something together that I so long for.
I longfor love, not just my heavenly father but a man who was into me and could not think of going anywhere without me or who needed me to rub his soreness away, make sweet passionate lustful love knowing that i lust for his flesh as he does mine.
Its just the noise of the shower, the vent, the steps, the washing machine from upstairs that Ihear like a blanket of smoothering staleness over me.
For now thisis all of me and what I know. My journal, my Bible the computer, my secret spot and holding my teddy bear as I go to sleep.....wanting so much more
I found these recently and they so fit here...............
Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out but to see who cares enough to break them down.
"We all have rooms we lock and daren't visit lest they bring pain."
on being enlightened
Sheri says "you are very right brained...... creative, in touch with all your senses and emotions...."
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
sheep are dirty, unintelligent and obstinate
Sheep are not all the clean and cuddly creatures they look from a distance. On the contrary, they are dirty and subject to nasty pests. They need to be regularly dipped in strong chemicals to rid them of lice, ticks and worms. They are also unintelligent and obstinate.......
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Green Pastures
Troubles and trials often betray those
On in the weary body to stray
But we shall walk beside the still waters
With the Good Shepherd leading The Way
Those who have strayed were sought by The Master
He who once gave His life for the sheep
Out on the mountain still He is searching
Bringing them in forever to keep
Going up home to live in green pastures
Where we shall live and die never more
Even The Lord will be in that number
When we shall reach that Heavenly Shore
We will not heed the voice of the stranger
For he would lead us to despair
Following on with Jesus our savior
We shall all reach that country so fair
Going up home to live in green pastures
Where we shall live and die never more
Even The Lord will be in that number
When we shall reach that Heavenly Shore
On in the weary body to stray
But we shall walk beside the still waters
With the Good Shepherd leading The Way
Those who have strayed were sought by The Master
He who once gave His life for the sheep
Out on the mountain still He is searching
Bringing them in forever to keep
Going up home to live in green pastures
Where we shall live and die never more
Even The Lord will be in that number
When we shall reach that Heavenly Shore
We will not heed the voice of the stranger
For he would lead us to despair
Following on with Jesus our savior
We shall all reach that country so fair
Going up home to live in green pastures
Where we shall live and die never more
Even The Lord will be in that number
When we shall reach that Heavenly Shore
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Stress is real, but God's perfect peace - our Prince of Peace - is greater, bringing us safety and stability.
"You have been a refuge for the poor, a refuge for the needy in his distress, a shelter from the storm and a shade from the heat."
(Isaiah 25:4)
boldly approach the throne ~~~~~~ somehow I have a dificult time doing so, as if totally unacceptable
Does God plant courage in us in any hour of desperation? Dont we need to ask for it?
Consider it wholly joyful, my brethren, whenever you are enveloped in or encounter trials of any sort or fall into various temptations.3 Be assured and understand that the trial and proving of your faith bring out endurance and steadfastness and patience.4 But let endurance and steadfastness and patience have full play and do a thorough work, so that you may be [people] perfectly and fully developed [with no defects], lacking in nothing.5 If any of you is deficient in wisdom, let him ask of the giving God [Who gives] to everyone liberally and ungrudgingly, without reproaching or faultfinding, and it will be given him.6 Only it must be in faith that he asks with no wavering (no hesitating, no doubting). For the one who wavers (hesitates, doubts) is like the billowing surge out at sea that is blown hither and thither and tossed by the wind
There IS a sense of stability in trusting God..... how does one get there...the ability to trust when all I seem to do is trust culpably in blindness?
Aug 16
"He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' (Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." ~~~ cant even grasp this part (2 Corinthians 12:9)
God's grace truly is sufficient for the struggle. Paul knew his life was in God's hands, and the special manifestation of His power, beyond human understanding, would allow him to press on.
That's God's promise to us also. His grace is all-sufficient for us in life's challenges, battles and tragedies.
As a little child is comforted by placing his hand in Mommy's, so are we when the Lord wraps His loving hand around us.
Not only are you safe in His hands, but also right next to the nail scars, your name is engraved.
I am not sure I could have gotten through this day without Bebo Norman's Great Light of the World or this visualization of putting my hand into the hand of my Shepherd.
Sometimes at night
I am afraid
I cover my eyes,
Cover my shame
So here in the dark
Broken a part
Come with your light
And fill up my heart
Oh great light of the world
Fill up my soul
I’m half a man here
So come make me whole
Oh great light of the world
Come to impart
The light of your grace
To fill up my heart
The wind of this world
Can push me around
Folding me up
Backing me down
But here in the dark
I’m not alone
So come with your strength
And carry me home.........
I wrote the poem Love on FB and mum's pick and Cheryl wrote: Her 1st Birthday in Heaven!!! How awesome is that?? I know you miss her terribly ElLois..but, one day.. you will see her again and she will say...what took you so long??? Then there will be no more night, no more pain, no more tears, never crying again..Praises to the Great I Am..we will live in the Light of the Risen Lamb!!!!
"Healing is sweet, but scars will remain. Forgiveness is Divine, It Restores Everything"
"faith knows that God always performs what He promises." to draw nigh.....do I really want him in my brokenness and ugliness without being able to forgive myself ?
"you have a tender and too trusting heart" Cheryl
"You have been a refuge for the poor, a refuge for the needy in his distress, a shelter from the storm and a shade from the heat."
(Isaiah 25:4)
boldly approach the throne ~~~~~~ somehow I have a dificult time doing so, as if totally unacceptable
Does God plant courage in us in any hour of desperation? Dont we need to ask for it?
Consider it wholly joyful, my brethren, whenever you are enveloped in or encounter trials of any sort or fall into various temptations.3 Be assured and understand that the trial and proving of your faith bring out endurance and steadfastness and patience.4 But let endurance and steadfastness and patience have full play and do a thorough work, so that you may be [people] perfectly and fully developed [with no defects], lacking in nothing.5 If any of you is deficient in wisdom, let him ask of the giving God [Who gives] to everyone liberally and ungrudgingly, without reproaching or faultfinding, and it will be given him.6 Only it must be in faith that he asks with no wavering (no hesitating, no doubting). For the one who wavers (hesitates, doubts) is like the billowing surge out at sea that is blown hither and thither and tossed by the wind
There IS a sense of stability in trusting God..... how does one get there...the ability to trust when all I seem to do is trust culpably in blindness?
Aug 16
"He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' (Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." ~~~ cant even grasp this part (2 Corinthians 12:9)
God's grace truly is sufficient for the struggle. Paul knew his life was in God's hands, and the special manifestation of His power, beyond human understanding, would allow him to press on.
That's God's promise to us also. His grace is all-sufficient for us in life's challenges, battles and tragedies.
As a little child is comforted by placing his hand in Mommy's, so are we when the Lord wraps His loving hand around us.
Not only are you safe in His hands, but also right next to the nail scars, your name is engraved.
I am not sure I could have gotten through this day without Bebo Norman's Great Light of the World or this visualization of putting my hand into the hand of my Shepherd.
Sometimes at night
I am afraid
I cover my eyes,
Cover my shame
So here in the dark
Broken a part
Come with your light
And fill up my heart
Oh great light of the world
Fill up my soul
I’m half a man here
So come make me whole
Oh great light of the world
Come to impart
The light of your grace
To fill up my heart
The wind of this world
Can push me around
Folding me up
Backing me down
But here in the dark
I’m not alone
So come with your strength
And carry me home.........
I wrote the poem Love on FB and mum's pick and Cheryl wrote: Her 1st Birthday in Heaven!!! How awesome is that?? I know you miss her terribly ElLois..but, one day.. you will see her again and she will say...what took you so long??? Then there will be no more night, no more pain, no more tears, never crying again..Praises to the Great I Am..we will live in the Light of the Risen Lamb!!!!
"Healing is sweet, but scars will remain. Forgiveness is Divine, It Restores Everything"
"faith knows that God always performs what He promises." to draw nigh.....do I really want him in my brokenness and ugliness without being able to forgive myself ?
"you have a tender and too trusting heart" Cheryl
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