Aug 16


what would i do with my 2 best friends..... Jesus, my Shepherd, Mary and then of course Sheri.

I went panic mode today and really accused the pharmacist of not doing her job.  So I took both bottles of levo in and showed her mistake to her and she finally realized what I had said is the truth and I am not a person who doesnt know their meds.  I feel pity for those who dont.

Got my abilify but no PA for cymbolta yet.  But did get some from Interconnections.

Mary and Sheri have been emaling with me these last days and it is such a calm in the so total aloneness and panic I create.

My Sheoherd heard my cry of desperation and allowed me to sleep for 2 hrs.

I will need Cheryl's help with kitty but only about twice.

I might need to take First Transit to the hospital thursday.  My loneliness is horrible but there are so many others in the same boat.  I feel as sorry for them as  do myself.

Stephy told Becky about my surgery . . . . I didnt want her too.  Said she might take me on thursday.  I really do not want her to.  Out of selfish reasons.  I really do NOT need her help if she isnt my sister.  And I dont mind at this point no one there after surgery.  Why should someone care.  if they dont care now, what gives them a right to later.   See all selfish reasons.

i read today that God have given me His full attention since the world began, when he formed me in the womb.  With this disability stuff, I do not feel like it but that is my lack of faith speaking as I told Sheri and my Shepherd today, I totally lack faith.  It's just gone.

It's mum's birthday today and I have been thinking about her all day.