there's the end and then there is a window

I've not been to group for 2 weeks because I cannot find a "sitter" for mom.

Mary called and encouraged me with her love the other day on voicemail, but she has no idea of  what it would mean to really sit at her feet and learn.

I feel so far away from God and feeling like I have no way of ever getting back "there."
I know its me and I know that I make mountains out of mow hills, but I feel like I should just want to fall asleep and never wake up again.
I lay in bed planning it.