ElLois,  I hear your agony.  I so wish I could help.  I think about you often and pray for you even more.  God is with you.  He knows what is happening and why.  Cling to Him.  Cling. Cling. Cling!  That is all you can do right now.  He promises that He will take care of us, be with us, meet our needs and that we can rely on Him.  Ask Jesus to show you where He is with you right now.  He is the only way that you will survive this.  I've been keeping my ears open for any jobs that I find out about that I could tell you about.  God knows.  God cares.  God cries with you.  You are so precious to Him.  He hasn't left you......Sheri